Our Poly Life

Our life as a Polyamorous Quad, with 10 kids.

Truth, Lies And Video Tape

on June 8, 2006

As we have stated before, we are a closeted quad. We live in an area where religion is tantamount and any oddities are not only frowned upon, but in many cases .. shunned.

With 9 children still at home and involved with band, sports, scouts and the like, we want our children to enjoy there lives as kids, not explaining why their parents are out of the norm.

Also, Big and I are in a high profile sort of career, where business contacts and their acceptance can make or break us financially. With this huge house, large number of kids and our grocery bill that rivals the mortgage each month… we can’t afford to alienate those contacts.

So again… I state….. we are closeted for the well being of family, not because we are ashamed of this lifestyle or our spouses.

Business acquaintances have come to know me as Big’s executive assistant. My usual flip comment is that “ his wife sends me a long to clean up his messes and keep him working hard”. This is usually met with laughter . Seeing me at his side is becoming a regular thing for our business and his family which live nearby and are also a part of the company.
Goddess and I have discussed how I would handle being asked by his family if he and I were having an affair. That is an easy response…. “I’m shocked you would ask, I am “Goddess’ ” best friend and I can assure you there is nothing happening that she is not aware of and in agreement to”.

Ok… so I am prepared to be questioned by family and associates. I am not however prepared to be blindsided.

Our family has been on a hunt for a Dr. closer to us. With new insurance due to be in effect soon, we found one in the ins. Directory. Perfect timing !!! Both Goddess and Mr. Big developed strep. So in they go… each seeing a Different Dr. in the same practice. He sees Dr. E. she gets Dr. L
They like the Dr.’s, so it is agreed that since they are family practice then that is who we will now use. During his office visit, in the course of usual conversation, Big has found that Dr. E. needs the services we offer. So he has set up a meeting to speak more in depth with him. Fast forward a few days…. LM(2) has developed and ear infection.

So I take her in to the Dr. to be checked. Since this is her first visit, the nurse takes the usual history, which includes the household members. She writes the words “Blended Family” on LM’s chart. Several moments later in walks Dr. E. We strike up a conversation. He asks why we chose to use their practice. I explain the reasons as I stated above and make the comment that my “house mates” had already been to see them for strep a few days prior. He makes the association and we chat about my work for awhile and then he scans LM’s chart and the nurses notations. Then he looks me in the eye and says “ A blended family eh?…. do any of the adults in the house have a relationship with other beyond marriage?”
I blinked in shock a few times… and then did what any good American Democrat would do. I pulled a “Clinton” and lied. (** * see footnote)

“ A relationship ?.. why no… we are all just very good friends.”
Dr. E smiled smugly and said “ I see” in a tone that told me he new I lied but wasn’t going to push the issue.
We concluded our visit and LM(2) and I left with a scrip in hand for her aching ears and I promptly called Goddess in a tizzy, she didn’t answer, so I drove home in knots and then promptly spilled the entire conversation to her upon my arrival. “ OMG… I just lied to the Dr., I wasn’t expecting it.. I knew Big has a business meeting with him soon… I was trying to cover…. OMG I just lied to the Dr…. straight up. Big is gonna wring my neck for outing us !!!! “
Goddess giggled at me and told me not to worry it wasn’t a huge deal… but then she says “ You need to call him and tell him. He sees the Dr. tomorrow, he’ll do damage control”

I felt like I was walking to the guillotine as I dialed Big’s cell number. He actually sounded rather un-phased when I retold my story. And said he would talk with Dr. E at his appt. the next day and would explain that I was blind sided and that I lied to protect him ( Big) our biz and the children. And in fact that is pretty much what happened the following day. I am told the Dr. was relatively unruffled about Big’s admission and dropped the subject quickly to move into other conversation.

So this happened a few weeks ago…. Why now am I bringing up ??
Well… LM(2) has a recheck coming up in a few days and I get to face Dr. E again and make my apologies for my of lack of truthfulness. I do not handle eating crow well…. So this should be interesting. I guess as time goes on I will need to create a better repertoire of no truth/no lie responses or become a better liar….. the latter of which sits badly with me.



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